...A traveller on a journey...

Thursday, April 27, 2006

The crazy things i can do when i'm not feeling ok...first of all, its been a long time since i last wore high heels. nowadays the only type of shoes i would feel comfortable wearing are those with super kontot heels or sandals/flats. when i was in my early till mid 20s, platforms and high heels were my favourites, coz that time no backache problem yet :p it doesn't matter if i'm already tall, it didn't stop me from wearing 'em sexy heels and platforms then..kakakakah! but tis few years, the only time i'd put on heels is when there is a functions or keluar jalan raya and stuff. 2ndly i don't remember buying white shoes before altho sometimes i like the design, coz being on the darker side, i feel white shoes would only enhance my "kegelapan" further..lol. But yesterday i did something crazy, not only did i buy a pair of heels, but its (very) white in colour. Nah amek ni. look at my sungguh tak cantik longish feet..lol. and btw before anyone ask again if i'm wearing white colour nail polish..hehe..the adebance reply is No. those are my real nails, as pucat as ever. sigh. so today no fast kartunish walk for me, wearing these, i'm forced to slow down my walking speed. and i feel Tall.

11:14 AM

Friday, April 21, 2006

Having a high tolerance/patience level sometimes works against me. Coz i dunno how to use it at the right situation at times. Sometimes i'm surprised at myself even. Why do i keep taking risks like these? All these while that flickering ray of hope refuses to go off. So stubborn. just like me (thats wat mom always said to me). But i must have inherited that stubborness from either one of them and i think it must be from dad :p ok jokes aside..i'm still having trouble picking myself up. some days i feel stronger, yet oth days i feel a total wreck with a very heavy feeling inside that makes it difficult for me to even put a smile on my face. I know ni sumer ujian Allah. Last year, i had this nagging feeling that i might have to face some big probs this year. True enuff, it came one after another. Why me? thats something that ever crossed my mind too but i do not dare and do not want to question fate.

Petikan from a very good book that i'm currently reading:

"Sesungguhnyer kesedihan hanya akan menambah dan menggandakan kegagalan tu sendiri"....this is very true indeed. problems does seem a lot worse than it is when its coupled with immense sadness. tapi kalau hati rasa lapang and ceria, masalah yg besar pon terasa macam kecil aje kan kan, janet kan? as i'm typing this now, someone's alarm clock just went off in the office. sapa plak yg tido pat dalam ofis ni.

3:43 PM

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Your Aura is Blue

Your Personality: Your natural warmth and intuition nurtures those around you. You are accepting and always follow your heart.
You in Love: Relationships are your top priority, and this includes love. You are most happy when you are serious with someone.
Your Career: You need to help others in your job to feel satistifed. You would be a great nurse, psychologist, or counselor.

Can try the quiz here: http://ynr.blogthings.com/whatcolorisyourauraquiz/

Yup at one point of time, i thot of quitting my job and be a nurse, that was 6 yrs ago. sekali apply for the nursing course, tak cukup org pulak so the course couldn't proceed. but at the same time i have a fear of needles and blood. so i think lebih baik duduk diam2 dalam ofis je :p

The other thing is i realised its been slightly more than a year since i started blogging!! time flies ah. lots of things have changed since then. changes to myself, personal life, surroundings etc. i'm still overwhelmed by whats been happening in my personal life especially these 5mths or so. Pardon me if i seem a bit withdrawn. Before i end this entry just wanna the lyrics of another of my fav song which i got reminded of after seeing her blog. Love this song!!

Silent Lucidity - Queensryche

Hush now, don't you cry,

wipe away the teardrop from your eye.

You're lying safe in bed,

it was all a bad dream spinning in your head.

Your mind tricked you to feel the pain,

Of someone close to you leaving the game (of life).

So here it is, another chance, wide awake you face the day.

The dream is over, or has it just begun....?

There's a place I like to hide,

If you open your mind for me,

a doorway that I run through in the night.

you won't rely on open eyes to see.

Relax child, you were there,

The walls you built within

but only didn't realise that you were scared.

come tumbling down and a new world will begin.

It's a place where you will learn

Living twice at once you learn,

to face your fears, retrace the years,

you're safe from pain in the dream domain,

and ride the whims of your mind.

a soul set free to fly.

Commanding in another world,

A round trip journey in your head,

suddenly you hear and see this magic new dimension....

master of illusion, can you realise your dream's alive

I.................will be watching over you

I.................am gonna help to see you through

I.................will protect you in the night

I.................am smiling next to you, in silent lucidity....

Visualise your dream,

Record it in the present tense,

Put it into a permanent form,

If you persist in all efforts,

You can achieve a dream come true.

.....a dream come true......a dream come true...

P.S. why the spacing function doesn't seem to work for tis entry eh?

2:32 PM

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

I wish...i hope.

11:52 AM

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Managed to do scalp treatment on monday nite. but i wasn't too happy with the service. First of all, the girl put the mixture on my hair instead of my scalp, nasib baik her colleague saw and told her for scalp treatment the mixture shld be applied onto the scalp, not the hair. 2ndly when it comes to washing the hair part, macam kasar gitu. my hair was all entangled and she was trying to comb thru my hair with her hands while washing it, sakit seh. but when she start massaging my head, that part was heaven..hehe. macam nak tetido pat situ juga jugak, too bad the massage was rather short. last sekali my hair was blown straight..hehe..the only few minutes i get to see how i look like with very neat straight hair, before it goes back to its original messy state :p

Made myself a new pair of specs few weeks back too coz my eyesight is getting bad. But when i put on the specs i feel pening, not to mention i think i look funny with it too. Macam cikgu bedah? To date, 2 people have already chuckled seeing me with my specs on. the specs looks a bit funny too coz the glass piece didn't fill the whole rim, there's a small gap between the glass and the rim at the side. memang pesen dia macam tu ke? got the specs done at one of the old antique looking shops at joo chiat complex.

Itu saje lah for now, need to get back to work. wait for my next boring entry :p

5:02 PM

Monday, April 03, 2006

Its a wet weather today. waiting for boss to approve something before i can issue it out then can pack up already. Feeling grouchy coz tak cukup tido. lots of things on my mind (as usual). Oh ya i'm happy that my sis really liked the gift i got her for her birthday, she wore it rightaway. I'm thinking of doing something to my hair..its dropping quite a bit lately. wonder if its coz i switched to a different shampoo or coz of stress..or maybe both? :-/

I'm trying to put the past behind and move foward, but i still get pulled backward into the same cycle again. I'm tired. Yet i'm not taking control of the situation and just going with the flow. Why? i don't know too. Altho it takes its toll on me.

On a lighter note, my little furball is getting...rounder!! so huggable. she purrs loud like a motorboat each time she's stroked. chappee and her are bestest of frens now, they are inseparable. thats them sleeping together in the basket i just got them few weeks back..will post some close-up shots of them soon.

5:43 PM